Monday, May 27, 2013

Step Yo Game Up If You Want A Better Prize...


So a couple weeks back I wrote a blog talking about women and what they want from a man. Granted it was quite the long winded expose of sorts but we somehow got through it in one piece; you can go check it if you haven't seen it here: http://zalgocometh.blogspot.com/2013/05/the-dilemma-of-nice-guy.html. With that being said on today's random blog-post I figured I would talk about the similar topic but from a different angle I have been thinking of. So I been thinking a lot about life and companionship and how as humans we really don't exist on this world to end up alone and without someone to compliment our personality and being as individuals. Sadly however this seems to have  become near impossible or at the very least increasingly difficult with each generation that passes. Whether this is due to feminism, a change in societal views or maybe we as men have lost sight of what a man should be and and woman should be but something has gone very awry. This current state of affairs leaves men asking the above "just what do these women really want from us?" but in reality we are more wondering why don't they want what we expect them to want?


Lets take it back for a second; kick it old school for a bit. Granted the olden ways may or may not be the best ways but if there wasn't some truth to the saying then it wouldn't exist in the first place. So back in the days of time long ago when we had kings and queens and prince and princess's and peasants and paupers; ok you get the idea . Back in medieval times granted women were somewhat repressed and not afforded most the opportunities men were but these were simpler times when all a man had to do was prove his valor to earn his fair maiden's hand in marriage; well that or slay a dragon I guess but ain't no body got time for that. Fast forward to the age of the 60's when it was all peace and love all around and people were way open and upfront with drugs, peace and love. There weren't really any rules or mixed messages you were just either down with the flower power or you were a square who was just a lackey for the government and against freedom.This was probably where the age of female empowerment and feminism started kicking off and would forever change the gender roles for years to come.


Salt N Pepa - Independent by jpdc11

So with feminism empowering women all the round world we saw a dramatic change in women and how they saw their roles in society. Somewhere along the line women started wanting to not only be treated equally but also allowed the same tendencies as men. Essentially becoming what they saw as a man and having that level of equality in their head. We see cases of this in the media such as the song above shows compound that with the thought with this new found independence and freedom the woman no longer even needs a man because she feels she runs shit and was truly meant to be a strong independent woman. Now i'm not saying there is nothing wrong with a woman wanting to have equal rights and self worth but I think when it gets to the stage where you feel you don't need or what a man or that none are out there for you that you need to realize that there is much fuckery afoot. Just because you are afforded some of the things men had over the years does not disavow the fact that at your core you are a woman and are held at such the standards that are what define a woman. As such men will still try to hold the door open for you at times or see you as the fairer sex and want to shelter and protect you. It is not an insult or a ploy to downplay your independence and strength because we as men all have and love our mothers so respect is always due in some way or another. So lets look at some of the things men hope for/expect from women.


No mind games, no second guessing, no hints just be open and upfront. All the years of feminism and equality talks and you want us to believe you don't have the confidence to this day to speak up? Nah; ain't nobody got time for that. If you are a blessed woman who actually knows what she wants you really shouldn't be downplaying your uniqueness and lowering yourself to the common woman's status. This is quite possibly one of the sexiest things a woman can do; when she exudes confidence she basically confuses the guy cause he is more than likely not used to a woman being like that; essentially being the hunter and not the hunted. Just know that the onus is on you to not only get but also hold on to the good in the man that you see and want for yourself. Once you accomplish this and essentially have secured your man you will bring out the best in him continually and he will do so with you continually to ensure both parties involvement and happiness. If you want something serious say you want something serious, if you want a fuck buddy then say you want a fuck buddy. Take nothing for granted and explain everything and you will see the quality of your life with men increase I guaran-damn-tee it. This is your first step to being more than a woman...



Once you have begun your journey to secure the man you so desire you have the maintenance aspect to ascertain. At the end of the day a mans desires or goals for interaction with a woman are usually pretty clear. He either wants sex, wants to be just friends, or wants to be friends until he can get sex with minimal complications. As such there isn't much guessing that needs to be done on the woman's part in terms of what it takes to keep and/or please your man; so this is why I feel the onus of the relationship initiation process should fall primarily with the female to ascertain whether or not her intended male is worthy of such from her. From there she can help the man to shape and improve himself to be the perfect match for her and she can provide the love and devotion he needs from her. You don't need the distractions of what is around you or may appeal to you because that will only lead to problems; people say they need space from their partner all the time which I think is dumb. If that's the case why the hell did you bother getting a partner if your space is that important to you in the first place. They say the devil finds work for idle hands but I say if you have your hands all around your partner loving them then what else you gonna go find time for?


Let me try to wrap this all up and hope I haven't confused and lost you by now. You know that saying if you think it you can achieve it? Well as cliche as that sounds its actually a reality but the problem is that figuring out what a lady wants when you aren't one is a tricky game. Most women either aren't sure what they really need or want a mid balance which is hard to achieve. They want a respectful man but in the same breath want a strong authoritative man who will tell them what to do but still somehow not ignore what it is that they want in the process. They want a man that will listen to them rant and complain but at the same time not point out the flaws and fallacies of what they are complaining about. they want a man who is great at sex but also respectful of her body and when it is she wants to have sex or not even though a man has a much higher sex drive than a woman in most cases. The list goes on and on, balance isn't impossible in some cases but have you ever tried balancing a father on a needle? that shit ain't easy; so I feel its better to eliminate the second guessing and just let the man know straight up what it is he is getting himself into and working towards securing for himself and his future. Let him know what he is making a decision towards putting up with for the future to come. Courting is most definitely still a man's responsibility but the onus is on the woman to guide and give feedback along the way to show that whatever effort the man is to make is abundantly worthwhile and necessary because you are more than a woman. 


So basically if tldr; watch from the 1:13 mark cause it will eliminate a lot of the unnecessary relationship head games:

5 comments

Olivia
May 28, 2013 at 1:03 AM

I really can't complain about anything that u have said. It really would be much easier if females were more up front about their feeling rather than just expecting a guy to guess what she is thinking or what she expects. communication is key,as well as listening to each other. Even from before entering a relationship,these two things are very important, and if u can't work on that from that point then it don't mek sense even venturing into it. It's just too bad that many of us have a hard time expressing ourselves cuz of fear of the person's reaction or their feeling getting hurt, but honestly it just makes sense to face up to it and get things out of the way and just say wat is on ur mind from the beginning, that way u both get things out of the way, know were u both stand and u can make a decision as to what the next step would be and then move on from there. It makes life a lot less complicated and less stressing to the brain. the way i see it, i'd prefer to know how u feel and get my feelings hurt rather than u holding shit back and have me on a roller-coaster ride of emotions trying to guess what the problem is, or if it is that u feel that u need time to gather ur thoughts and get back to me fine, but just spit out wat is on ur mind so that we can move on to the next episode. then again many of us don't even know wat the hell we want so we really can't tell u. sigh.....yes some time pepl can be quite difficult, that's y i'm switching to cats and chocolate. they never complain and they understand. lol

May 28, 2013 at 7:38 AM

Darn right you cant complain cause its all pretty much true and laid out systematically for you to realize as such. I get that a person may be wary of their feelings but I'm not saying you have to come out with a Shakespearean soliloquy to confess your love just be more open and receptive to advances if you already know what it is you want and want to go for. Cut back on all the hard to get power mind games to try shield yourself and be in control and just let the magic of love work or not work depending on the case as such. cats are cool and all but they do complain chocolate is good comfort food from time to time but not exactly how you wanna end up relying and living your life on. lol. at the end of the day whether you think you need/want a man we all need some level of human comfort to feel whole sooner or later.

Anonymous
May 29, 2013 at 6:30 AM

Self professed 'Nice guys" are almost always passive aggressive bitches. This blog is proof.

I bet you own a fedora too.

May 29, 2013 at 7:40 AM

lol. don't really know how this blog is proof of that exactly since im not exactly a nice guy as far as I know cause I know doods out there way nicer than me and I have more than gone through my own asshole like scenarios. Sadly no I don't own a Fedora but kinda wish I did cause Indiana Jones looks so boss in his but sadly fedoras don't fit me.

May 29, 2013 at 7:43 AM

oh and thanks for the feedback as well. opinions are always welcome and appreciated as such. ^_^
*forgot to add tht to the above*

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